Some awesome energies have come swooping in over the past few days and I find myself going deep within, exploring those parts that no longer serve me.
For me right now, it means that I choose to change my old behaviour patterns of feeling less worthy and not deserving. This shows up in my life as continually giving to others more than I give to myself and then leaves me feeling like I really don’t matter. Yes, this is all ME stuff and I acknowledge this. Good heavens, I teach that acceptance and value of worthiness is key to Simply Living Well to all my clients.
My special, valued friend, mentor and I have a very unique connection…we knew it from the first minute we met. This person is tuned into me and saw that I was showing signs of “un-ease.” We explored these signs and how they were showing up and yup, I was again choosing to suffer under the “poor me” syndrome. We all need to find that “someone” that can tune in and be there for support, as we are not meant to be on this journey alone, even though this is a journey that only oneself can do. We need others.
For most of my life I have been “alone” and had to do most everything by myself, including raising 5 children and working. I had no one I could count on to be there for me in the ways that mattered! I am not saying that family was not there to help out when really needed. Gosh, they did the best they could! But all love back then was “conditional.” I had to meet a certain standard based on their criteria/mental health issues/belief systems and of course I tried hard to meet that standard of being perfect, cause I wanted to be loved, accepted, valued, to deserve love and attention. Isn’t this what we all desire?
So, I see this old pattern of beating up on myself showing up in many ways. I have come a long way in recognizing those beliefs that I held onto and much healing has taken place. But you know, it is a journey and this old belief was so engrained within me, forming and shaping the way I interacted with myself and ultimately how I attracted others to interact with me. No wonder I had struggled so much in the past.
This new energy has helped me tremendously, looking at the parts of me that still resonate with that old pattern and these awesome energies are here helping me to “let go.” I willingly choose to realign with my higher-self that already values, loves and accepts me. And I choose to remember, that the most important factor in all of this is, that I love myself, nurture and care for the me that I am. This means putting myself first. I have had plenty of reminders over the past 2 weeks to ensure that I do not forget how vitally crucial it is to keep this at the forefront of everyday.
I cannot make a difference in others lives if I don’t continue to make a difference in my own. Amen?
So, I choose to continue, diving in deep to those old beliefs that do not serve my highest good anymore, allowing my evolving, no matter what it may feel like, cause I know it is shaping me into a more loving, compassionate me. Life is so beautiful when I don’t resist.